Beautiful Plans Unfolding: Trusting God's Plan Amid the Battles of Life!

This week has been hard.  My heart has broken many times this week for a couple families who I am honored to have in my life.  These two families are going through the unimaginable BUT  they are choosing to believe that God has a plan in both of their situations.  In the quiet and reflective moments of my week, my mind has transitioned to their stories of having to make very difficult decisions for and about their children and my heart breaks for them.  This morning while laying in the quiet, I was filled with this thought... what if God's most beautiful plans are accomplished in our weakest moments?  Perhaps the moments where our lives are unraveling and the walls are caving in around us, are the moments where our lives take shape in a way that only God can design.  Perhaps the trials of our lives are opportunities to feel God's presence in a greater way that when life is perfect.

I am discovering more and more that there is a sense of beauty in the breakdown moments  of our lives.  Though the hard and difficult moments are painful and life shattering, there is a sense of peace that can really only be found when we place all of our cares and concerns in God's hands.  Often when our lives are a pin prick away from exploding, these are the moments where we either run to God or away from God.  In these "make or break" moments, our beliefs are challenged and we have to make the choice to live what we profess or deny the potential of God's movement in our lives.  In these moments, there can be nothing in between these two extremes and perhaps that is why these moments are what define our belief systems and relationships with God.  But I can tell you today, that no matter how difficult and painful your life is right now... there is peace and power in God!

We can strengthen our faith (even amid the battles of life) when we choose to believe that God always has a plan and purpose for us.  A couple of  the most beautiful things about life lies in the fact that God loves us unconditionally and that he is the best source of comfort and peace.  We are never alone because we are always being lead by God and he is always with us, even when we may not see him or feel him.  We have to ultimately make the choice to believe God's plans for us and accept the fact that God's plans may look and feel differently than the plans that we have for ourselves.  A major factor within our Christian walk, is often our ability to let go our our painful moments and let God move within them.  We don't have to live in fear and we don't have to live in sadness, we can make the choice to stop living in these qualities and instead make the choice to live in the belief that God's will is perfect and beautiful.  

My challenge for you this week is to accept the promise that Hebrews 13:8 provides. "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever."  We never have to question if Jesus is different moment from moment and storm from storm.  Jesus has always been with us and that will never change.  Jesus has always loved us and provided us with peace and that will never change either.  I want to also challenge you to reflect upon the moments in your life where you have lived amid "breakdown" and realize that God has always held you in his hand and that where God leads you, he will NEVER abandon you.  In the hard moments of your life, don't run from God but run to him. Choose to remember that no matter what happens in your life God has a a beautiful plan!  God does not abandon us nor leaves us to fight our battles on our own; he walks with us and is the greatest source of refuge that we can find.  Ultimately, the "difficult" trials and struggles of our lives hold the greatest opportunities for us to gain a glimpse into the power, peace and love of God. There is a reason for everything in life and there is something beautiful that can bloom from every situation, good or bad.  Our life songs are composed in the most beautiful way when we choose to believe that God is always with us and that he is always for us.  We can never outlast or outrun the love, comfort and peace that only God can provide! Until next time friends.

Reflections about Growing Up!!

Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?  After much reflection this week... I realized that I can!  You see, when I was younger I was fearless and courageous.  I was someone who didn't worry about perfection; I was only concerned with helping others and enjoying life to the fullest.  I didn't second guess myself and I was not the anxious worry-wart that I so often am today.  A huge part of me wishes that I could tell the much younger version of myself to never change!  If I could catch her gaze and get her attention, I would say "don't worry about pleasing everyone and fitting a certain mold of who society thinks you should be- instead just be the wonderful and unique creation that you are."  Let's face it, growing up can be painful and sometimes it feels that you are tugged and pulled into a million directions, but we have the potential to remember and draw inspiration from our past.  This type of reflection is often a way for us to tap into the person that we remember which can be very useful because knowing our past helps us to better understand our potential, future and purpose in life.

You see, the beauty of life is that we can make the choice everyday to rise above the expectations of society and grow one step closer, with each waking moment, into the individual that we dream of becoming.  By breaking free from the need to conform to society, we can live as the unique and special creations that we were birthed to be.  Yes, this choice is in many ways counterculture to the one size fits all personalities and dreams that this world tries to force us to accept.  Yes, this choice can be very difficult to make but it is not impossible.  Often this choice comes with maturity and other times this choice is about desiring to live as more than just a puppet orchestrated by the world and its standards.  For me, this choice has been inspired by the countless children who I have worked with over the years who have taught me the importance of living in the moment and not letting others dictate your beliefs and happiness.  In many ways my campers, my students and my clients have been some of the greatest teachers of my life!  They have challenged me to become more than just a 'grown-up' but an individual who embraces my past, creates purpose for my present and is excited about my future.

I believe that we were created to be more than just passengers in the great journey of life.  In fact, it is is my belief that we were created to be courageous, movers and shakers, dreamers and world changers.  We were each made with an unique and individual purpose and it is our duty to seek and work toward fulfillment of that purpose.  The fact is, we don't find complete fulfillment in this world, in fact, often this world leaves us empty, heartbroken and unhappy, but we don't have to live with these qualities of life.  We can find fulfillment in God and in his amazing presence.  Here on Earth, we are all children of the all mighty God.  Because of our heavenly father who loves and accepts us, we can become courageous and fearless and we can dwell in his all-embracing presence of glory, love and goodness.  I find comfort every second  in the fact that I am a child of God and that I don't have to be perfect.  Because of my relationship with God, the mighty creator of everything, I can rise above the challenges, struggles and pain of this world.  I don't have to conform and bow down to society and its empty standards; I can believe in and accept the goodness and grace of God and become an over-comer.  My hope and fulfillment is in God alone, not the world!  I don't have to allow the society to tell me who I should be, I can discover who I was birthed to be by leaning on my creator and fulfilling the purposes, plans and dreams that he alone has for me.

My challenge to you today is to realize that when the world breaks us down, God's love sets us free!! God is freedom and he is powerful and mighty enough to pen beautiful stories through our lives if we allow him to be the author of our souls.  Strive today to surrender to God and to dare to become the story that God desires for you to become.  It is never to late to claim your soul from the world and accept the beautiful and purposeful life that only God can provide to you.  Now, which person will you choose to be? The courageous one, the mover and shaker, the dreamer or the world changer? Or, maybe you will choose to be all four and more? It's your choice, so go out and fulfill the unique and special purpose that God has for you.  Until next time friends!

Easter is...

Easter is more than just baskets, egg hunts, the Easter bunny and fancy church outfits.  Though these symbols of our modern culture are not bad things, they are not the true representation of what the season of Easter truly is about.  Easter is a time where we realize, reflect upon, accept and appreciate the fact that through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ we are free from the chains of sin.  It is through the events surrounding the holy week and the story of Jesus's life  that we are able to overcome the emptiness induced by our sinful nature and we are truly able to shed the skin of our sinful pasts by stepping into the skin of a new creation.   This is what is glorious about Easter and the savior whom we love and serve; the sin of our lives can be washed away and we can be made new.  Easter is the time where we can stop and realize the power of God, the holiness that comprises him and the all sufficient grace that he longs to give each of us.

Easter is about the re-birth that only God can provide.  Easter is about realizing that we are imperfect and in need of a savior.  Easter is about believing that we are loved so much that God would send his son into our world as a sacrifice so that we could have the opportunity to accept the salvation that only he can provide.  Easter is not about emptiness but freedom.  Easter is about confessing our sins and making the choice to accept salvation so that we can be in a relationship with the creator of everything.  Easter is about living our lives with conviction to praise God through not just our voices but our lives.  Easter is much more than our modern world will strive to make it into; Easter is holy and it is a time for the world to realize the love of God and the great story of Jesus Christ once and for all overcoming the sin of humanity through the fulfillment of the gospel.  Ultimately, Easter spells out the beauty of a new life!

I am so thankful for the new life that I have accepted and claimed through Jesus Christ.  The greatest gift that I have ever received has been nothing that I could acquire in this world.  The best gift that I have ever been given is an empty tomb, the promise of a risen Savior and the salvation through which my life was changed.  The beauty of my identity in Christ is that Jesus Christ died for me and my sins and I choose to live only for him.  I want to challenge you to search your heart and accept Jesus into your life (if you have not yet) and to make the choice today to live only for him. I also challenge you to make this Easter different from all the rest.  Don't let this weekend pass without thanking God for his love and praising him not just with your voice but with your life. My prayer is that each of you are filled with the presence of God's love this Easter and every day.  Have a wonderful and blessed day!

We love because he first loved us...

"We love because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19).  This is one of my favorite verses of the bible because it demonstrates why I believe that authentically loving others is such an important quality.  We love others not out of obligation but out of purpose.  We were created to help our brothers and sisters in their walks through life.  We were birthed with the purpose of love.  Perhaps that is why love is so natural for us and why it is a quality that we search for all throughout our lives.  Love is the key to unlocking the true potential of humanity.

A few years ago, my church body adopted a new Easter tradition.  Our pastor's wife was broken for the lives of orphans and worked with the non-profit Feeding the Orphans to bring the Forget the Frock movement to our church body. The first year that our church participated, I was skeptical.  Being raised in a small-town southern baptist church, it was unfathomable that you would wear a t-shirt to church on Easter Sunday.  To me, Easter had always been as much about pomp and circumstance almost as much as it had been about the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ (wow, this is a very convicting realization!).  I had been raised wearing beautiful Easter dresses to church and could not imagine not perusing the racks of my local JC-Penney to find the perfect dress for Easter Sunday.  I will admit, I did not participate the first Easter that some of our congregation chose to purchase  t-shirts to help orphans be given a full belly of food and the opportunity to learn about the love of God through individuals loving and taking care of them.  I was prideful and ultimately, I did not understand.  I didn't realize how the simple purpose of feeding children could translate into a authentic representation of God's love.  But my eyes were opened and now I see!

The next year, the founders of Feeding the Orphans led a discussion at our church.  The spearhead of this organization, a young girl with a big heart for God and others, by the name of Sydney O'Leary rocked my world that Sunday.  The pictures and stories shared in that discussion, broke my heart of my pride and showed me that loving others through practical and life-changing acts of love in God's name, is what I as a Christian am supposed to be seeking to do every minute of my life.  To me, it became much more than just buying a t-shirt.  That t-shirt was an avenue through which children could have a better life here on Earth and in eternity. As Christians, we are commanded to care for the disadvantaged, the fatherless and those in need. Religion that does not strive to fulfill this commandment is dead and useless in the eyes of God.  In fact, in James 1:27, it is written, "Religion that God our father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself form being polluted by the world."  You see, I was operating from a polluted ideal about my mission as a Christian.  I had been polluted by pride, tradition and the unwillingness to look beyond my personal views and into the actuality of what I am commanded to do as a follower of God.  The Sunday that the O'Leary family visited my church was the turning point in  my realization that I have to do more than just feel "sorry" for the orphaned, widowed and disadvantaged. Feeling sorry for others doesn't spread the message of God; only action does that.  For me after that Sunday, Easter and every day has become more than just pomp and circumstance, tradition and selfishness. My heart has been broken and I have been revived with the purpose of loving others because God first loved me.  

I provided the link above for the Feeding the Orphans organization's website.  I hope that you will click on the link and learn more about their mission, purpose and projects.  This is an organization that I have grown to love and I am so excited for how they are actively building the kingdom of God.  I am excited for next Sunday (i.e. Easter Sunday). As I am beginning to prepare my heart for reflection of God's love and the greatest gift ever given to us, salvation of sin and rebirth through Christ, I am excited to see the movement of Feeding the Orphans throughout our little world.  Sunday, I will wear my shirt as I have the past couple of years, not out of pride or obligation but with purpose.  I can't wait to see what big and mighty things God accomplishes this Easter through individuals that are actively choosing to throw tradition to the wind and choosing to care for and love others in a practical way that has the potential to be life-changing for the many orphans who are often neglected of love in our world.  I am thankful for individuals like Sydney and her family.  She was birthed with a big purpose and I am so excited to hear how God is moving in her life and in her work.  

My challenge to you this week is to discover the ways in which you can love others as God has loved you.  Whether that be by purchasing a shirt to feed a hungry child or some other avenue, chose to be all in to sharing the love that you are capable and gifted to share with the world.  My prayer for you, if you are a follower of God, is that you would make the choice today to love others because God first loved you.  My prayer for you, if you are not a follower of God, is that you would surrender to the power of God's grace and salvation and that today you would make the choice to start a new life as a child of the king of kings. There is no one or anything greater than God.  He is the light out of darkness that will help you to start fresh with a new life made possible by rebirth from your old life. No one in this world can love you and care for you as much as God does. No matter where you are in your life, there is power in the name of Jesus.  He can break every chain that binds you and only he holds the power to make you a new creation.  I challenge you to let this Easter be different from all the others of your past.  Choose to love and care for others not just at Easter but every day.  If you are a Christian, open your heart to your purpose of being the hands and feet of God through love and compassion.  If you are not a Christian, I pray that you will open your heart to accepting God's love and the unending grace that he provides.  We were made to do more than just coast through life. We were created to be world changers and to leave the world a better place.  Choose to live with purpose and love because that is what make the world go around!!

Give Out What You Most Want to Come Back...

"Give out what you most want to come back." This has always been one of my mottos. It is hard to realize sometimes how much our thoughts and actions in our day to day lives affect the trajectory of our experiences. Sometimes when I catch myself in the moment of a "difficult" situation, I have to stop and pray to myself, "Lord give me patience, compassion and the ability to see others the way you see them." This week has been a difficult week and sadly this has been my prayer through most of it, but I made it through!

You see, I work with kids! I love my job and I have never wanted to do anything except change the lives of children for the better. When I go to work each day, I remember that if I am going to expect to teach my clients patience, hard work, compassion and empathy for others; I, myself, must offer those things to the world. Life for me lately, has become more about purpose and mindfulness and less about just allowing life to happen around me.  I have learned that when we seek to make the world a better place, it becomes less about investing in our own experiences and more about investing in the lives of others! When we make the mindful choice to give to others what goodness we want for our own lives, the world is changed for the better. Each us have unique qualities to offer the world and we all have something that we can do to make the world a better place. The niches that we are all born with are not accidents they are God's way of filling us with the potential to change the future and rewrite history. Those niches are the opportunities that we have been given to turn "difficult" moments into blessings! So in those moments where we can only bite our tongues,  smile and pray for a better outlook, we must realize that we desire for others to give us patience, compassion and empathy and if we deserve those blessings than others do too!

Life is ultimately about how we deal with the obstacles and issues that arise along our journey. It is also about how we treat others and how we walk through the fire. The ideal world, that I imagine, is one where everyone is treated equally, all individuals feel loved and compassion is rampant. But last time I checked the news, my ideal world has not yet come true. I aspire for everyone within the sound of my voice, gaze of my eyes and reach of my hand to know the love and grace of God. I feel that to change the world, you have to melt hearts from stone into love and share with others what makes salvation in God such a life changing thing! This involves being a living representation of God's love and making the choice to share that love with  the world so that maybe God will flow into the hearts of others like a mighty wave.  Every day (good or bad) affords us the opportunity to show others the power and presence of God.  What we gift the world as Christians is the most realistic and authentic representation of God that most people will ever experience. This realization proves how big of a job we, as Christians have  in our day to day lives. If we are going to be the hands and feet of God and change the world; we must first make sure that we ourselves are living as God would want us to and that we are giving to the world the gifts and qualities that God would most want us to share.  

  So let your light shine and dare to believe that you have the potential to change the world. Give to others the blessings that you believe are good and admirable.  Make the choice every day to live with purpose and the understanding that you have the potential to move mountains with God by your side. Life is hard and it tests us from time to time, but when we give our lives to God, we have someone to walk the road with. I want to challenge you to give to the world what you most want to come back. Strive everyday to let no one leave you without being lifted up through compassion, patience and empathy. Love is the key to everything and when we actively decide to make love our  mission, the lives of others will be revolutionized through a movement of God that cannot be contained 

A New Chapter is Beginning!

  Wow.  Life sure does have a way of blessing us with much more than we deserve! Last week I received the news that I have been praying God to bless me with for over a year.  I found out last Monday, that I was accepted into my dream graduate school and that I am formally a cohort of Western Kentucky University's master of science program in the speech language pathology major starting next fall.  Words will never describe the relief and peace that flew over me in that moment.  I had achieved what I thought at times was impossible and it was all with God's blessing and grace; but most importantly for his glory.  In the last few weeks before I found out, I decided that I was going to give it all over to God and that I would allow him to move in my situation as he saw fit rather than only how I  dreamed and wanted.  I prayed day after day the prayer that has become a reoccurring theme in my quiet time... "God have your way and fulfill in me what you alone desire for me to have."  You see, life should be nothing more and nothing less than a fulfillment of our heavenly father's plan for our lives.  We should desire nothing more than to see his will carried out. Our plans should become secondary to the plans of our creator.

  I guess you could say that I put all of my eggs into one basket.  I ignored the adamant advice of my professors and only applied to one school.  I was trusting that my feeling that God was calling me to this specific program at this specific time would be enough to allow me the faith that I needed to trust only him.  I only took the GRE one time and only allowed myself to study for less than one month.  Me, the girl who gets testing anxiety way too easy, who took the ACT on three horrendous occasions and  too easily second guesses herself, was believing that God would bless my score and carry me through that obstacle in my path.  God was sufficient and he moved in that situation and helped me become very competitive with my GRE score.  I don't say this to bring any glory to myself and my abilities but to show that God is a wonderful provider and he blesses those who believe that he will fulfill the promises he makes over our lives (Luke 1:45).  In the words of the amazing gymnast Gabby Douglas, "I give all the glory to God.  The glory goes up to him and the blessings fall down on me."  When we trust, believe and give glory to God for every thing in our lives, amazing things happen!  This is a wonderful equation that yields blessings.

  My challenge for you is simple, believe that God will do the impossible in you.  God does not require that we are masters of a specific craft or have amazing skills, he simply requires that we are willing to place all of our trust and faith in him and believe that he will fulfill the promises that he has made for our lives.  God only requires the faith of a mustard seed and he will bless that and turn it into something unimaginable.  I often am reminded that our dreams are only as big as the God we believe in.  We were not made to live this life on our own; we were created to follow the glorious God whose heart is kind, whose eyes blaze like burning fire and whose power is enough to move mountains and make even the most scary dream possible.  God is the ultimate and he is worthy of all the glory that we could every muster.  I ask that you pray for me as I enter this new journey and that you all will join me in choosing  daily to trust God and follow the path that he has laid for our lives.

Learning How to Trust My Journey

  I was recently digging through my jewelry drawer and stumbled upon two pieces of jewelry that I hadn't thought about in couple of months.  I was looking for my usual spring weather jewelry when I found my two Trust Your Journey bracelets, that my big sister and I call our "sister bracelets."  A smile immediately formed on my face because these two bracelets has experienced a lot of joy over the couple of years that I have owned them.  From camp where my campers taught me that life is about investing and serving others, to school where I realized that I have a passion for learning and growing intellectually.  These simple bracelets are always a source of reflection when I would look at them.  Life is about trusting our journey and believing that our dreams are capable of coming to reality.  We may not understand all that life throws at us but the good and bad experiences of our lives teach us that life is about embracing change and moving through life's ups and downs with a spirit of grace, joy and optimism.  Life is about moving forward not backward.

  When we embrace this notion of trusting the journey, we realize that nothing in life is coincidental.  For example, I have been thinking a lot lately about the future and the desire that I have to become a speech language pathologist.  I can't help but think, as I await the email determining if I start graduate school this fall or not, that the events and experiences in my life thus far have been apart of the journey that has allowed me to want to pursue this career.  When I trust that God has placed this call on my life to help others find their unique voice, I am reminded that all of the educators, mentors, friends and family who have encouraged me on this path were not doing so by chance; but by purpose.  They were the support system that I needed to have in order to understand the potential that I have to do this job.  Though the road is stressful and winding at times, I have to keep moving on and trusting that God has seen me this far and he will not turn his back on me now.  We can all find comfort in this realization!  We are not alone and our lives are not a coincidence or accident, our lives are 100% a realization of the plans that God has for us.  Isn't that such a beautiful thought!

  My challenge to you today, is to trust your journey and to not loose hope in whatever portion of the journey that you are currently on.  Change is a part of life but the only way to truly live in the moment is to look forward and not backward.  We are all like an arrow and we all are capable of finding purpose and meaning in our lives when we take time to understand why we are being directed toward a certain part of life.  I may not know all that God has planned for me yet but I believe that he is with me and moving in the midst of what is unfolding.  I will give him all the glory for whatever happens, because I know that he is an amazing God who cares for me and loves me deeply.  We may not understand everything from this side of the kingdom but in the end it will all make perfect sense.  Because of this, we just have to learn to trust our journey and the one who is fulfilling it!

Beauty in the Breakdown

  I have been discovering lately that when we let go of how we think life HAS to look; we are set free to experience the joys and blessings that God places in our lives every moment of every day.  It is in the reflection of the simple moments of life, such as seeing the rebirth only found in spring after a harsh winter or the sun peeking out from behind rain clouds and having that change in the horizon lift your mood that day.  The truth is that there is always something that we can choose to be thankful for! In fact, it is our ability to find the beauty in the terrible and the mundane in life that we are able to realize most that life is beautiful and precious. It is honestly easy to find joy and strength when life is perfect and when our experiences are unfolding as we think they should, but it is more difficult to find those things when our lives are unraveling.   If we were to be honest, these are the moments where we struggle the most; but if we were also to be honest, these are the moments where our lives are broken to become something more than we could have ever imagined.  There really is beauty in the breakdown!

  Life is more than the expectations we hold for how our lives have to always look and feel.  Lately, I have found that my perspective about life is evolving.  I think honestly, this change was sparked by six months of unemployment post graduation where I was forced to realize that the expectations I had about my first "real" job would be very different than what I had first imagined as a student.  I applied for job after job and even though I had lots of interviews, I found that none of the jobs that I was looking into would help me achieve the dream that I feel God has me, which is to become a speech language pathologist.  I was blessed to find a job that I feel God had a hand in leading me to and I am happier than I could have every imagined.  My school work is thriving, I am gaining experience and knowledge of my field of study and I work with amazing clients, staff and families.  Honestly, I was silly to think that I could be a director of a non-profit and my school work would not suffer.  I was silly to think that I had to make a certain salary, wear a cute business wardrobe to work and be the boss of others to be successful and happy in my job.  God had to break me of my selfishness before I could inherit the gifts of joy and blessings that he has for me at this juncture of my life.  It had to become more about God and the plans that he had for me and less about myself and the plans that I had for a perfect life.  I had to accept that God must be first!

  This year, my mantra for 2014 is simply "All in."  For me this idea takes multiple forms.  I want to first of all be all in for God and trust that he is always with me and leading me throughout my experiences.  Secondly, I want to be all in in making the kingdom of God grow and helping others to realize the peace and love that God can give them if they just choose to believe and surrender to his movement in their lives.  Additionally, I am striving this year to be all in for my job and to me that means working hard every moment of my work day to improve the lives of the clients and families that I serve.  I also want to be all in with my classwork which means that I need to continue learning and working to become the best future professional in my field that I can be.  This mantra calls for big changes but these changes are worth it.  I had to realize that life is not always going to be perfect and that it is not always going to go as I would wish, but as a follower of Christ my life is not my own... it's my creator's.  I am just thankful and blessed to be apart of it!

Cha-Cha-Cha Changes!

A lot has changed since I last posted on here.  In December, 2012 I graduated from Lindsey Wilson College.  I graduated Summa Cum Laude with a B.A. in Communication and Psychology.  Post graduation, I waited for God to place me in the job that he would desire for me to have.  It was a very trying time for me because with lots and lots of job interviews came lots and lots of frustration and no job prospects.  My luck changed in the summer of 2013 when God blessed me with an amazing job.  I work at a pediatric clinic that services children and teens with a variety of special needs.  I am happy beyond words to go to work every day.  I love the children that I work with and I feel that God is allowing me to make an impact in the lives of the families that I work with.  It is amazing how perfectly God changes the circumstances of our lives so that he receives the Glory for what unfolds.

I feel that my life is still evolving.  Right now, I am waiting to hear back from graduate school to see if I have been accepted to begin my journey as a Speech Language Pathologist.  I love this field of work and I know that God has filled my heart with this passion for a reason.  I should know within the month if I was accepted or not so prayers would definitely be appreciated!  I'm excited to see what other blessings God has waiting for me.

I hope to keep up with this blog more consistently in the future.  I realized the other day that blogging is something that I really enjoy.  I will keep you all posted on how the future continues to unfold and I plan to overhaul my blog in the coming months so that it is more conducive to the new direction that I feel God is leading me to, through this.  Until next time friends!!