Beauty in the Breakdown

  I have been discovering lately that when we let go of how we think life HAS to look; we are set free to experience the joys and blessings that God places in our lives every moment of every day.  It is in the reflection of the simple moments of life, such as seeing the rebirth only found in spring after a harsh winter or the sun peeking out from behind rain clouds and having that change in the horizon lift your mood that day.  The truth is that there is always something that we can choose to be thankful for! In fact, it is our ability to find the beauty in the terrible and the mundane in life that we are able to realize most that life is beautiful and precious. It is honestly easy to find joy and strength when life is perfect and when our experiences are unfolding as we think they should, but it is more difficult to find those things when our lives are unraveling.   If we were to be honest, these are the moments where we struggle the most; but if we were also to be honest, these are the moments where our lives are broken to become something more than we could have ever imagined.  There really is beauty in the breakdown!

  Life is more than the expectations we hold for how our lives have to always look and feel.  Lately, I have found that my perspective about life is evolving.  I think honestly, this change was sparked by six months of unemployment post graduation where I was forced to realize that the expectations I had about my first "real" job would be very different than what I had first imagined as a student.  I applied for job after job and even though I had lots of interviews, I found that none of the jobs that I was looking into would help me achieve the dream that I feel God has me, which is to become a speech language pathologist.  I was blessed to find a job that I feel God had a hand in leading me to and I am happier than I could have every imagined.  My school work is thriving, I am gaining experience and knowledge of my field of study and I work with amazing clients, staff and families.  Honestly, I was silly to think that I could be a director of a non-profit and my school work would not suffer.  I was silly to think that I had to make a certain salary, wear a cute business wardrobe to work and be the boss of others to be successful and happy in my job.  God had to break me of my selfishness before I could inherit the gifts of joy and blessings that he has for me at this juncture of my life.  It had to become more about God and the plans that he had for me and less about myself and the plans that I had for a perfect life.  I had to accept that God must be first!

  This year, my mantra for 2014 is simply "All in."  For me this idea takes multiple forms.  I want to first of all be all in for God and trust that he is always with me and leading me throughout my experiences.  Secondly, I want to be all in in making the kingdom of God grow and helping others to realize the peace and love that God can give them if they just choose to believe and surrender to his movement in their lives.  Additionally, I am striving this year to be all in for my job and to me that means working hard every moment of my work day to improve the lives of the clients and families that I serve.  I also want to be all in with my classwork which means that I need to continue learning and working to become the best future professional in my field that I can be.  This mantra calls for big changes but these changes are worth it.  I had to realize that life is not always going to be perfect and that it is not always going to go as I would wish, but as a follower of Christ my life is not my own... it's my creator's.  I am just thankful and blessed to be apart of it!